Finding my way back to the wagon...
It has been a while since I've updated. I've just been stressed out with so much to do, and so tired of trying to pull myself back on the wagon that I decided I just needed some time off from constantly thinking about what i should and shouldn't eat, not paying any attention to that, and just all around being frustrated. The weird thing is that i KNOW things are changing because of the way my clothes fit and my sizes change, but the numbers on the scale just don't, and then i get so freaked out b/c i just don't know what the fuck is going on.
Prom was this thursday and I had the time of my life. It was really really fun, and the best part......i wore a size 10 dress! I admit a tight size ten, but still my goal was a 9/10. In all honestly, idk...the dress i was originally supposed to wear was a 12 but it fit perfectly and it was a Jessica McKlinton size 12, and everyone says you're supposed to go up a couple of sizes in her dress just b/c they're so odd.......and i did try on 11's, 12's, 13's when i was trying different dresses on, but the one i wore was a 10 damn it! That made me happy, especially since i wore a size 8 shirt from H&M which didn't fit when i bought it a month and a half ago, and a bathing suit i bought during the winter now looks good. So My body is changing, but its def. time to commit myself to this 110%, and start seeing a change on that scale. I def. let myself get away with eating too much junk and not working out enough. I'm never going to lose this 50 lbs (estimating) that I want to lose to get to my goal of 135.
This weekend, i drank and ate so much junk, but im not at all annoyed with myself. I knew i was going to do it, and i decided that i wasn't going to stress long before i started. I mean, who goes to the shore for the weekend to get drunk with the rest of their class and doesn't? It was more then worth it...
Class trip to Virginia Beach is in ten days, my birthday is in eight, and Cancun is in just a little over a month. So I've decided that my goal is to be at 170 before Cancun. I think that I can lose about 15 lbs, I really do. I have this quiet resolve in myself right now, and its making me really happy. I'm just going to do this full tilt...eat right, workout, and make myself happy. Even with prom, I felt like i looked great, but the pictures themselves im not that happy with, so i do think that the camera adds extra weight, so I just want to be sure that when I look back at Cancun pictures, im happy. When I get back from vaca, I've got just about 2 months until college, and I do expect to do a lot of working out, and eating right, and just living healthy, so I expect to get quite close to goal before school. I plan to be at 135 by Thanksgiving of this year. I know i can do it.
A lot of stuff is going on right now, with this being the end of my senior year...i've got a lot of good stuff going on, but also a bunch of final projects. However, instead of freaking out and stressing, I'm going to turn towards being calmer and putting myself in a better place mentally.
Off to get some work done and plan my meals out for 2m. I think by doing this just day by day, it should help a lot.
Sending out getting skinny for summer vibes to everyone!
Prom was this thursday and I had the time of my life. It was really really fun, and the best part......i wore a size 10 dress! I admit a tight size ten, but still my goal was a 9/10. In all honestly, idk...the dress i was originally supposed to wear was a 12 but it fit perfectly and it was a Jessica McKlinton size 12, and everyone says you're supposed to go up a couple of sizes in her dress just b/c they're so odd.......and i did try on 11's, 12's, 13's when i was trying different dresses on, but the one i wore was a 10 damn it! That made me happy, especially since i wore a size 8 shirt from H&M which didn't fit when i bought it a month and a half ago, and a bathing suit i bought during the winter now looks good. So My body is changing, but its def. time to commit myself to this 110%, and start seeing a change on that scale. I def. let myself get away with eating too much junk and not working out enough. I'm never going to lose this 50 lbs (estimating) that I want to lose to get to my goal of 135.
This weekend, i drank and ate so much junk, but im not at all annoyed with myself. I knew i was going to do it, and i decided that i wasn't going to stress long before i started. I mean, who goes to the shore for the weekend to get drunk with the rest of their class and doesn't? It was more then worth it...
Class trip to Virginia Beach is in ten days, my birthday is in eight, and Cancun is in just a little over a month. So I've decided that my goal is to be at 170 before Cancun. I think that I can lose about 15 lbs, I really do. I have this quiet resolve in myself right now, and its making me really happy. I'm just going to do this full tilt...eat right, workout, and make myself happy. Even with prom, I felt like i looked great, but the pictures themselves im not that happy with, so i do think that the camera adds extra weight, so I just want to be sure that when I look back at Cancun pictures, im happy. When I get back from vaca, I've got just about 2 months until college, and I do expect to do a lot of working out, and eating right, and just living healthy, so I expect to get quite close to goal before school. I plan to be at 135 by Thanksgiving of this year. I know i can do it.
A lot of stuff is going on right now, with this being the end of my senior year...i've got a lot of good stuff going on, but also a bunch of final projects. However, instead of freaking out and stressing, I'm going to turn towards being calmer and putting myself in a better place mentally.
Off to get some work done and plan my meals out for 2m. I think by doing this just day by day, it should help a lot.
Sending out getting skinny for summer vibes to everyone!
posted by bloomingbeing @ 4:04 PM
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